Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby!

If you’re anywhere in my age range and did not have sanctified music listening habits in the early 90’s, you may have been into a group called Salt-N-Pepa. (I always felt bad for Salt, because her name sounds pretty lame alone, whereas anyone could like being called Pepa.) They had a string of hits, but “What A Man” is one that got the most airplay.

Let's_talk_about_sex! Single by salt-n-pepa

In 6th grade, I got a new neighbor who moved in behind us, across the alfalfa fields. Her name was Jenny—and Jenny was different. She listened to hip hop. I think since we were in South Jordan Utah (close to Salt Lake) the kids were good Latter Day Saints and didn’t mess around with that stuff. Jenny let me borrow the CD for a day to see if I liked it. The cuss words made me uncomfortable in a couple of the songs but I didn’t want to turn it off until I had listened to the song titled “Let’s Talk About Sex”.  Why? I don’t know. It had the word sex in it. What more do you need?


This weekend I was so happy to get to talk to a present for a group of young ladies from the Georgia Cumberland Conference of Seventh-day Adventists. As I looked over their comment cards and social media posts I noticed that nothing has changed. Just like me, these great girls were really interested in the topic of sex. It’s exciting! It’s intriguing! My first night’s talk was on “The Oldest Trick In The Book” and how satan was able to tempt Eve into taking the fruit with three simple steps. I explained to the girls that he uses the same steps today to draw us into all kinds of sin, but we focused on the allure of sex.

I want to suggest we talk about sex FAR more often with our Jr. High and High School girls. We should have “Sex-question Sabbath” once a month or something. Ok, maybe there’s a better name for it, but hey—we need to start somewhere.

It is not acceptable to just tell our young women to avoid sexual intimacy before marriage! They need to know that it was God’s idea first—that the world has hijacked it. They need to know that God’s goal is not to withhold pleasure—but to create a space for ultimate pleasure. That the point of waiting is not to make them feel shame and guilt for wanting sex, but to prevent the fear, shame, guilt and baggage from ruining a potentially great relationship.

We need to shut the media up and do some of the talking about sex. We need to take advantage of their interest to demonstrate that the character of God is not one of withholding. We can do this. You can help.

Happy sex talking!

P.S. If you want a couple of ideas on how or what to start talking about, check out my recent YouTube videos on how God relates to sex.

God & Sex Part 1 (with marshmallows)

God & Sex Part 2 (with calluses)

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